Post by Captain_Quintus on Apr 4, 2016 7:08:47 GMT
Postby quamada » Sat Mar 31, 2012 9:06 pm
Begin Log:
Ensign Keiko Shinjo, personal log star date (insert here). We are on Deep Space 3, we being the Aquarius crew including myself. It is nice to be among Starfleet officers again, even though it would be nice to have some respite. The commanding officer of the star base appears to have been murdered, and I have been assigned to Medical to help out. My assignment is to help determine the details of this man's death. ::Sigh:: You know how I feel about them. Corpses, you know. I'm trying to be professional, and do my duty. It's just hard. I haven't had a decent night's sleep in days, since beginning this assignment. I find my mind wandering, just trying to get through and hoping it's all over soon. And then I feel bad about that. As you can imagine, all this means progress is much slower than it should be.
::Another sigh:: Mom, I keep going back to the time years ago when I thought about applying for that criminal justice and forensics program. You were right to have me shadow that detective, even though I only lasted a day. That's when I knew I did not want that life. I wanted to be able to sleep at night. Not think about- well.
So if after careful thought I've made my decision, why does it come back to haunt me? This is so much worse than my one-day shadowing. And I know I'm complaining. I'm not proud of that. Nor am I proud of my work thus far on this assignment. I am trying to distance myself, so I can think clearly. But all I seem to be able to do is wonder how his last few horrific moments felt and how horrible it would be to die like that. At least in battle I am too busy surviving to think. And a good sonic shower turned all the way up beats the remaining thoughts out of my mind, with a good meditation and then night's sleep cementing it. But this.... This working around all this death. It just brings it all back. All of it.
Well anyway, I'm going to quit my whining now. Tomorrow I have a big day ahead of me, re-analyzing ballistics and wound structure to pinpoint range, trajectory, and beam type. Hopefully I can finally distance myself from.. The body. Ok, enough of that. Good night. Love to all my family.
Keiko out.
End Log